We went to the library today. But we went ill-equiped, because the umbrella stroller I’d assumed was still in the van was not.
So this meant that in the space of 15 minutes, free-range Jude did the following:
- tore through the library shrieking like a maniac- but a joyful maniac
- removed both shoes somewhere between the F and I Fiction stacks
- flung all the baby dolls out of their cribs in the play area, and proceeded to crawl into the newly vacated doll crib
- yelled for his sister to cover him up with doll blankets in the doll crib
- escaped the children’s wing of the library, making it within 5 feet of fresh parking lot air before being caught- this escape prompted one of the librarians to announce, oh-so-calmly to the entirety of the children’s wing, “A child dressed in green has left the children’s library and is running down the hallway. He is not wearing shoes.”
- was escorted out of the library slung over the left shoulder of his mother, like a sack of potatoes, all the while screaming, “Bye bye babies!” to the babies whose crib he had stolen
This is why we go to the library once every few months. I’d much rather pay fines than suffer the humiliation of Jude.
Be a priest Jude, be a priest.